How to Find Your Purpose (And Get More Joy Out of Life)

What’s the biggest question you have about your life. For most people, it’s something along the lines of “what would make me happy?” Fulfillment comes from living our purpose, but how do we discover (or should I say uncover) what our purpose is?

No one can tell you what your purpose is.

However, the good news is you have the answer hidden inside of you. How does it get buried or forgotten? Think of all the people who influenced you and the person you’ve become. It starts with your parents, grandparents, aunts and uncles; followed by teachers, friends, TV, magazines, and social media. As a result, by the time you reach your 20’s, there have been thousands of people (directly or indirectly) who’ve played a part in shaping you.

That may or may not be okay with you; it depends on how aligned you feel with your purpose. In most cases, we’ve done what we were told we should do. We were good little girls and boys and wanted to please our family and teachers. In an earnest attempt to gain approval, we may have veered completely off course. By the time we hit our 40s or 50s, we might be wondering whose life we are living, because it certainly doesn’t feel like we are doing what we’re supposed to be.

All it takes to remember who you are, and what you have been put on this planet to accomplish, is a little digging to access what your soul already knows. Step into the role of archaeologist and I’ll guide you to discover your true self and calling.

There are many clues in your life that reveal your purpose.

Your personality, experiences and feelings offer valuable insights. Grab a pen and paper and let’s look at uncovering these clues together.

• What did you spend your childhood being absorbed by?

• What stories did you want to hear repeatedly?

• What did you want to be when you grew up? Can’t remember? Ask your parents, cousins, aunts and uncles. Look at old family movies and photographs. Listen to some music that was popular at the time; perhaps it will trigger some memories of your favorite past times.

• What kinds of things do you like to decorate your home with? What do you love to collect? Is there a theme emerging? Alternatively, what kinds of things are you completely adverse to having in your home?

• Where do you feel most comfortable in your environment? Do you like quiet places or do you prefer to be right where the action is? Indoors or out?

• Even your clothing can hold important clues to your purpose. Do you refuse to wear dresses, or ties, preferring a more casual look and feel? Or are you happiest in a business suit?

• Pay attention to the things you enjoy doing and that feel natural. Your interests, talents and hobbies reveal clues. Look for the patterns. What’s are your super powers? What comes easy to you that other people find difficult?

• When you walk into a bookstore or library, what section do you gravitate towards? When you’re looking through Netflix, what kinds of movies or TV shows do you prefer? Do you recall any movies or books that stirred up your emotions so intensely, you still can’t shake them months later? That’s a clue. Our logical mind is full of ‘shoulds’ and wanting to prove our worthiness to others. But our feelings, well, they never lie. We just need to pay attention to them.

• Which of your interests, talents and hobbies do you enjoy most? Is there something you’ve always wanted to pursue? One powerful question I like to ask is, what would you do if you were completely confident in your ability to succeed? Fear of failure is one of our biggest obstacles, followed closely by the fear of scarcity. Suspend these fears, even for just a moment, and free your imagination.

• Some of us are already on the right track and our current job is a stepping stone towards fulfilling our life’s mission; others have lost their way. Do you enjoy your work? Make note of specifically what you like and dislike about your job. Of all the jobs you’ve had, which have you enjoyed most, and why?

• When you reflect on your life, both personally and professionally, what accomplishments are you most proud of? Make a list and consider why you feel that way.

Your answers to these questions are all pieces of the puzzle.

Connect them and you may see a picture emerging, revealing your soul’s desire and reason for being here. Once you’ve uncovered your purpose, you often need to let go of the parts of you that no longer serve you. Hesitation is normal at this stage, because change is hard. However, it’s important to take the plunge – or at least take one baby step, and then another. Trust that you will be supported and the next steps will be revealed when you are ready. Then, all you have to do is go with the flow.

“Remember that the longings of your heart are often your higher self, asking to be born. The fact that you want to accomplish something is evidence that Sprit is leading you in that direction.”

–Denise Linn

What more can you do?

Don’t be discouraged if you put in the work and are still unclear on your mission. Let it incubate. Spend time in nature to clear the mind clutter. Pray or meditate to gain clarity. It could be that the timing is not right. Or, perhaps there’s some fear is blocking your view; it may be helpful to get the support and guidance of a professional (therapist, coach, counsellor) to help you either release the fear or move past it.

It takes effort and commitment, but please trust that your path will unfold before you. Once you remember who you truly are and why you are here, you will experience joy, fulfillment and meaning in your life. And isn’t that ultimately what we are all restlessly searching for?

P.S. Let me know if you get any inklings about your purpose from some of the questions above by commenting in the section below. Thanks!